mathNEWS Issue 111.1: Friday, September 25, 2009

A Discovery

You picked up this paper expecting to read the opinions of fellow math students such as yourselves. And yet secretly, behind the curtain, I have made a terrible discovery: We are being taken over by engineers.

Now don't panic, and don't let them know you know. I managed to sneak this article into mathNEWS without the approval of the editors. If there is an editor's note above, they have found me out and the information within this article may have been compromised. But I digress.

At the heart of mathNEWS are the editors, beings of great power, people who took up the mantle at great sacrifice to their own sanity. Through research I have found out that 75% of our current editor staff are engineers, the software menace that beseiges us. [It's actually 80%, but don't tell anyone I told you. — InsidED] And besides that, many of the writers are also these people. I am a true math student, and I know they must be stopped before they take over and use the paper for their own devices. My fellow math students, I need your help. If you come and write for mathNEWS, we may yet be able to turn the tide, and be rid of the scum once and for all. Send me your tales of triumph over the softies, and I will attempt to get your stories out.

This is only the beginning.

The mathNEWS Renegade
mathNEWSrenegade@gmail.com



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