mathNEWS Issue 111.1: Friday, September 25, 2009

profQUOTES

As soon as someone says Think outside the box, they're probably outside the box.

Zorzitto, AMATH 331

...and if you're wondering why there is a subscript 2 there, it's because my hand doesn't know what my brain is thinking.

Poulin, AMATH 351

Whether you love this depends on if you like evil things...

Chan, CS 466

What do you say to an engineer in a suit? Will the defendant please rise?

Ward, SE 390

For those who don't know me, I'm Paul Ward, but I also respond to Hey you!

Ward, SE 390

This course is about project management, which, in theory, is taught in PDEng.

Ward, SE 390

A computer scientist can write whatever damn code they like. Software engineers can't do that or they will probably get kicked out of the profession. At which time they will probably call themselves computer scientists.

Ward, SE 390

When you're ready to kill your teammate, be proactive.

Ward, SE 390

If you don't hand these in exactly on time, I have Italian TAs with connections to the Mafia.

Ward, SE 390

We do a damn good job of teaching you technical skills. Well, the other profs do. I don't know about me.

Ward, SE 390

That's what you're doing in a microwave. you're exciting water the molecules. Well, in the scientific sense, we're not going to have any water molecules strip dancing.

Ward, SE 390

If you have a good idea, never write it down.

Ilyas, CS 348

[Student] Do we have to memorize all this history stuff?
[Prof] I expect you to listen and pretend to be interested.

Ilyas, CS 348

Some people like pornography. I like process models.

Godfrey, SE 390

Who is taking this course to learn about rats running around in mazes?
[No hands go up]
We'll all get along.

Greenaway, PSYCH 101

[About falling in love] We'll learn about what happens in your brain, not just other areas.

Greenaway, PSYCH 101

If you don't laugh in this class, there's something wrong with you.

Greenaway, PSYCH 101

How do we get rid of that f? You tell it to f off.

Struthers, STAT 230

We will do things to this problem you haven't even dreamed of!

Chan, CS 466

Here's the notation. Don't worry, it's a little ugly, but I still love it.

Unknown, MATH 115

These functions sometimes get used... I've seen them 4 times in the past 8 years, so they do get used.

Dupont, MATH 117

If you find my handwriting is too messy or cramped, let me know. After all, we are all one big happy family. I have no idea who the mother is.

Dupont, MATH 117

I like Wikipedia. If I see something I don't like, I change it.

Clarke, CS 137

It's an axiom because we are not going to take it to be true.

Forrest, MATH 147

[prof] A really good search engine should tell you who your next girlfriend will be. An exceptionally good search engine should give you her phone number.
[student] Would that be a 900 number?

Unknown

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