Since 2003 the Black Eyed Peas had been searching for what they affectionately refer to as "The Love", and last Wednesday the search was called off after police officials reported to have locate the remains of the Love.
"It has been a long and grueling search for us. Although, we would have very much wanted to find the Love still alive and well, the fact that we can bring this seven year drama to a close is good enough," said singer Will.i.am in a recent press conference. With the search coming to a close, the Black Eyed Peas expressed their wishes to recall their hit album Elephunk which contained the song Where is the Love?, a plea for the community at large to help the group locate the Love.
There was a special service held for those who have been adversely affected by the loss of the Love for the past few years. Group members Apl.de.Ap and Taboo were showing their remorse for their loss by sharing a fifth of vodka, and reminiscing over fond memories of when the Love was still in their lives. "All I have left for comfort is the cold sting of twenty consecutive shots of vodka" bemoaned Apl.de.Ap. Taboo's spirits was much higher as he planned to begin a new search for the Lust, the False Hope of Emotional Satisfaction from a String of Meaningless Sexual Encounters, and the Perfect Meatloaf Recipe.
With the news of the recall so soon after the group had to recall their album The Energy Never Dies due to changed projections for tonight's prospects, this new blow to the group hit just that much harder. Singer Fergie provided the closing comments to the service by saying that "... with [the Love] gone the world has become an unforgiving, desolate wasteland not much different than living in Utah."
The Hee Ho