Green McShakes, green beer, and a drunken beating of snakes. What makes St. Patty's day more fun? As you are crossing through the emerald fields at night, in quite possibly a drunken stupor, you may find the fairies dancing in their little rings.
Them fairies, you've got to love them. They appear in your yard and dance the night away leaving little mushroom-like gifts in your pocket. If you ever see them, the fairies that is, tell them that Gin from Haluton left his hat behind the last time I saw him...that was about two years ago.
Wow, what a night that was. Obviously it was St. Patty's day, otherwise why would I be writing this article. It was St. Patty's day and things started early. I'm not quite sure when I lost track of where I was. The day started out at the Bomber drinking large pints of green lager. Some small people I hadn't seen before, all gussied up in green, true to the St. Patty's tradition, turned up. These wee people began buying me beers and we ended up dragging the drinking well into the night.
It was only after St. Patty's day that someone had suggested that maybe those little ones were leprechauns. Whatever, they were kick-ass fun to be with. So if you ever get a chance, party with leprechauns. I'm not really sure, but maybe one of them slipped something into my drink because there is a big lost part in my memory where I find myself lying face down in a field.
It was bogus. I was wondering if I had been mugged but everything seemed to be in order. I even had an extra thousand dollars in my wallet! So I got up, but then I saw this swirling vortex of what looked like little glowing things. There I was thinking, "Cool, there are fireflies out tonight." But no, but no! Oh no! These flying glowing things were fairies! They looked human but were about the size of your hand with lightly glowing wings. No magical fire or anything, but they were cool to see.
One of them flew over to me, I later found out his name was Gin because he likes Gin and Tonic. He had a tiny yellow and green striped hat. In a small but hefty voice he said, "Hey bud, you okay?"
I was and said so, and he invited me over to join them. Dancing with fairies is hard! They fly and do a whole bunch of moves that I can't put my mind around. Okay, so I don't have wings and I'm about three billion times as large. I was afraid I'd step on one at first but these people are nimble and despite my clumsy stumblings we seemed to get along marvelously!
So the morning after, I woke up in the field, all alone. But around me was a circle of mushrooms. I thought it was all a dream but when I got home I found out my pockets were full of mushrooms and one tiny yellow and green striped hat.
Quite a happy evening—only Math Grad Ball this year came vaguely close. So if anyone out there does know Gin, I have his hat.
Cubby "Three" Kenobi