Goodbye to the SS Bounce

Yes its true. It's time to say goodbye to my car, the SS Bounce. I guess it's proof that the government's Drive Clean doesn't like my love of big old cars. For that is why I have to get rid of her before the end of July. It's hard to believe that I have only had her for a little bit over three years. It's been through so many adventures with me. From the Algonquin canoe trip in Summer '99 with 2 huge aluminum canoes strapped to its roof, to moving many different people to many different locations, to its adventures during the last Eng Scunt, both in the pre-scunt parking-brake incident and on the road trip to Niagara.

So why is it called the SS Bounce? Well first of all it's a 1988 Crown Victoria, which is a full size car from when full size cars were really FULL SIZE. So it's a BOAT -> hence the SS. The Bounce comes from the fact that both the shocks and struts are shot! So you don't even have to hit a real bump for it to bounce. So it feels a lot like a boat in many ways. I am sure going to miss the bounce and the comfy seats <sigh>.

Now, how do I get rid of such a wonderful car? The first option would be to sell her. But I think that would just be mean. The next option is to actually give her away to someone. I like this option since it keeps her alive. So does anybody out there want my car? All you have to do is convince me that you will treat her well. Be forewarned though, that it will probably be bit of work to get her to pass safety and Drive Clean. Failing someone wanting her I need a third option.

This one is definitely the most fun option! Somehow disposing of her. So, do we smash her? Do we see just how high she will bounce? Email me your ideas at nvursack@uwaterloo.ca. I'll buy a cookie (or something better if its really good) to the person with the best idea. [Like launching her into a lake? — TaxiEd]

So this of course means that I am looking for a "new" car. So if you know of any full size car/station wagon/van from 1980 or older that is for sale let me know. Why older then 1980? Drive Clean's grandfather rule, of course!

Nadia V. Ursacki
"Oh god, I think I'm getting sea sick!"