profQUOTES

You might notice that the profQUOTES are a bit thin this issue. Well it is the beginning of the term, so sometimes people need a little reminder. So here is a simple algorithm. When your prof says something funny, write it down. Remember the instructor's name and the course you heard it in. Now you have some choices: either write your quotes down in paper form and slip them into the BLACK BOX, conveniently located between the comfy lounge and the centre stair well on the 3^rd floor, or — for the tree-saving types out there — you can type up the quotes and e-mail them to us at mathnews@uwaterloo.ca. Now on with the quotes!

"You have to be crazy to take this course. And maybe you are."

Berry, CS 445

(Time: 8:30; Topic: classes) "This is going to be a classy lecture ... you're so sleepy you don't even catch the lousy puns!"

Berry, CS 445

"Another word for equivocation is bullshit."

Berry, CS 445

"No I didn't randomly pick them. I know what I am doing, you just don't know!"

Cunningham, C&O 350

"I could have written it in 3 lines, but I'm a teacher and I get paid for it."

Cunningham, C&O 350

"Then I threw away the last constraint. Why did I do that? Because I am an idiot! It was better that I answered that than you."

Cunningham, C&O 350

"I've done more of these than you, but that is probably because I have a higher tolerance for boredom than you do. That is because I am old."

Cunningham, C&O 350

"Just to give you a useless example."

Springer, STAT 231

"I can't say it's 8:30 to explain that mistake. I'll say it's almost 4:30 and I'm tired. You can't use that excuse."

Springer, STAT 231

"They invented math because they couldn't find dates."

Forrest, PHYS 263

"Who is going to study math, how boring."

Forrest, PHYS 263

(On software testing) "In case you get turned on by this."

Engels, CS 134

"We're going to be making love to matrices all term long."

D'Alessio, MATH 136

"Don't tell me you slept in later than 6 am!"

Ferguson, MATH 138

"You have to choose your method of laundering money very carefully."

Smith, ECON 102

"That is your other class, we aren't warm and fuzzy here, though we do have PEZ."

Vasiga, CS 240