I was very disappointed to find mathNEWS publishing a rant about the lack of baths on campus.
You would think that a thing like a bathtub would not be essential to your academic life.
Old Man moment #1:
Back when I was frosh, if we were longing for a bubble bath, then we would do something about it.
This whole rant reminds me of the time that, he that should remain nameless (we will call this person "Marsha" — not his real name), was wanting a bath. Not just any bath; (this calls for a "bum bum dum ...") a Bubble Bath! So what did Marsha do? Complain to mathNEWS that he lived in Village? No, he just made use of one of the many bathtubs in MC.
Did your frosh leaders forget to mention the bathtubs in MC? Well I do not believe that our frosh leaders pointed out the existence of the tubs. We just happened to notice in one of our many trips to the washroom while in MC.
Old Man moment #2:
Back when I was frosh, I had my math classes in MC.
It's true that the bathtubs are right out there in the open but that just made them easier to find. Of course, Marsha is discreet enough to wait till MC is deserted. Too bad, this never happens.
'Twas the night before a duedate, and all through MC
Not a creature was stirring, except maybe a green man
The bubbles were brought from Farah's with care
In hopes that Marsha would soon be there
The green men were working away in the hall;
While visions of freshly-waxed floors danced in their heads
And Marsha in the bathtub and the photographer nearby
Had just settled down for a long MC bath
When out in the hallway there arose such a clatter
We sprang from the scene to see what was the matter
Away to stall Marsha took flight
Entered the green man with all the bubbles in sight
The moral of the story #1: don't complain when there are solutions you could implement.
The moral of the story #2: there is a reason why they make the sinks in the washroom so large and able to support the weight of a person.
The moral of the story #3: we were crazy as frosh.
The moral of the story #4: if you hide in a washroom stall long enough even green men will leave eventually.
- an ex-crazy ex-frosh