It was an exciting fall <election> campaign, but last night it became clear that <party everyone voted for> won. "We easily <crushed> our foolish opposition," said <New premier>. "Our plan to take over <the world> -- I mean lead the <people> of Ontario is now complete". They then announced that they will <defenistrate> ahead with their plans to decrease <something> and increase <opposite thing>.
Meanwhile, <second place leader> said "We vow <revenge>, one day when they'll be <sleeping> in the legislature we'll --", at which point he was <conked> on the <head> by a party spokesman, who then announced that they'll be holding <a leader election> to select a new <talking head>.
<Random losing party> was caught whining, "Why does no one <love> us? We promised lots of <porn> and <free food>."
<Another losing party> noted that "Our <brainwashing> adversing techniques aren't working, next time we'll just try <bribing> <people>"
Elections <Canada> noted that <more or less> people <slept> in this election.