Review of Troy

Warning the following article is completely true. For those of you who think mathNEWS is made up of nothing but lies (usually a good assumption, especially in my articles) are up for quite a rude awakening. I assure you this is not going to become a reccuring theme, I'm only doing this the once, for I think that it's going to be harder to exagerate the truth any more. So now I bring you the feature article, my movie review of Troy.

Let me start this off by telling you, that before going to see this movie, I had heard from several friends that there are better things to go see (This is where something like a Shrek 2 plug should go). However another friend wanted to go see it, and I thought, what the hell it can't be that bad. Now, before I say too much, let me tell you that I'm not a fan of movies causing the authour of the orgininal work to spin in there grave. Now I'm not going to say that this movie did that, I'm just going to show you the following table. There may or may not be some spoilers in here, but I think you all know how it ends (they use a big wooden horse).

Homer's IlliadTroy 10 long hard fought years16 days, I counted them. Also 3/4 of them were days off of them just sitting around Agamemnon survives the Trojan WarOdysseus is the only of the greek kings to survive (of course because he is also the only of the required characters for the sequel, yay Hollywood sucking) Achilles is for all purposes invincible except in one shotAchilles is just really really good (arrows to the chest kill him) they use a giant horse to get into the city by making the trojans think its a giftThey instead use a giant rabbit

Now, as you can see there are a lot of things that make the movie really off. Sure the battle scenes can look kind of cool, but the plot is really messed up. You should expect some greek mythology out of a movie like this, but instead there is none. So, if you, like me don't authors spinning in their graves then you can say that this movie sucks. However *if* you're a girl then you'll probably like this movie do to Brad Pitt trying to wear as little cloths as possible, and that other Elf-guy being there as well. If you really want a good trojan war story I suggest looking up the Wayne and Shuster version or actually reading Homer's Illiad. (The penny arcade about the movie is pretty good too)

DanS