Missing First Year Student Found

Clue left in bathroom breaks the case

Ayami Flush was finally found this week after a long and dedicated search by Campus Police and student volunteers. She was found on North Campus, where septic tanks had left her slightly broken.

The case-breaking clue was discovered by Obi Servant who found Miss Flush's broken watch on the floor next the toilet she was using on Monday. "I'm always terrified that something will happen in the bathroom. When I saw the watch, I realized something horrible must have happened," she said.

"As far as we can tell, the toilets in the MC got so violent that they sucked her in," said Const. Letty of Campus Police. "We have recommended to the university in the past that they modify the toilet suction so that the tide caused by the force behind the flush on the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th floors don't do just this thing. But they always wait until someone finally gets hurt. Maybe now they'll listen."

University administration had no comment for mathNEWS, but we were able to get a comment from Plant Ops, who released the following statement, "We have known for some time that the toilets in the MC have been too full. Based on complaints about the toilets flooding the bathroom, we thought there may be a problem. However, we cannot press forward without the request of the administration. We do recommend that these problems be remedied immediately."

When asked what she'd recommend Ayami, had this to say, "Please, fix the toilets in the MC. I hope this never happens to anyone else. Please don't let them come out of the bathroom drenched. At the very least, ensure that no one ever gets sucked in again."

Ayami will remain at Grand River Hospital for overnight observation and will hopefully be released on Saturday.

TP