VPF sez

Over the weekend, an unnamed food services establishment in Waterloo suffered a humiliating loss at the hands of my roommates. In the most recent incident in a string of petty thefts, 5 pint glasses and a Stella goblet were most unceremoniously removed, one by one, from the table. Winter coats are the mule's sliced bread. I first noticed there was a problem when the only glass left on the table was mine. It's notably tough to keep a straight face when you're watching someone lurch across a parking lot with a pint-sized bulge protruding from their thigh. Oh, and one of the girls took the mustard and ketchup, in case you think only guys are felonious.

Math.random(): stumped by the black question. Indeed, what is the difference between a black shirt, a blackish combination of paints, and the light-less, windowless rooms mathies resort to for coitus? I have yet to receive a satisfactory answer. Absence of light? Not all mathies are over-weight. Inability to reflect? Not all mathies drink before engaging in the sack race. What is it then?

Before answering that question, let me tell you something serious. At the last council meeting, I presented a plan to invest MathSoc's extra funds in 0- risk investments (savings accounts, money markets and GICs). The extra funds are currently sitting in our chequeing account, earning no interest. Simply by creating these accounts we can earn interest without any additional risk. The income will be reported term to term in the budget as interest income we can spend on more MathSoc initiatives. This isn't to say that we will be collecting more money to invest more money; instead this plan is simply the correct thing to do with the surplus we've collected. I encourage all of you to continue coming up with good uses for the society's money.

Back to the black question. Which I'll answer... In September. So long suckers, I'm out of nyah.

VPF David Wheatley